A guy in a Citabria was pulling
a huge banner – the advertising
kind – along over I-4 in Orlando.
The pilot, a fourteen-year experience
aviator, lost track of time or failed
to keep a close watch on his instrumentation.
It was when the engine began to sputter
that he noticed he was in deep kimchi.
Dropping the banner and declaring
an in-flight emergency, he scoured
the area for a suitable place to land.
The banner cast adrift settled
rapidly over the Sunday morning chaos
The banner, it was reported, read:
Buckle up for safety / Don’t drive
The pilot safely did a three-point landing
on the John Young Parkway, stopping
in front of the Walmart.
Okay, a disclaimer: This didn’t happen. It happened in my mind. Every time I see one of those banners I wonder, “What would happen if…?” This is one of the most benign of my DIY scenarios. Actually, I doubt you could add more chaos to the mess that is I-4… even dropping a banner on it.