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In darkened turmoil
a child who dreaming
sleep’s chaos to roil
and darkness uncoil
At the foot unreal
climbed abed flicking
a forked tongue soft feel
touched my tender heel
A black serpent here
upright voiceless scream
unreasoning fear
a nightmare quite clear
Reality now
our dog calls alarm
snake with angry brow
Chase the fear but how?
Snakes should flee, instead
‘though I’m armed he comes
viper he brings dread
strike, sever his head
A Cottonmouth he
will charge and strike out
the he may be a she
baby snakes may be
Brave, I’m no great shakes
fear with action me
I’ll do what it takes
“Why’d it have to be…?”
∞
dVerse – Poets Pub
Poetics: What Are You Afraid Of?
Mish is our barkeep tonight and she’s challenging us to open up and share our fear(s) in a poem. Come join us; but don’t say I didn’t warn you! Muahahaha!
Yes…snakes should flee!!
I felt like I was “slithering” in and out of dream in this piece. They like to visit the playground at the preschool where I work. I hide my fear for the sake of learning opportunities.
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Creepy… those slithery, venomous creatures are.
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I like snakes but can understand why many people are afraid of them. The only time I was anxious about a snake was when my (long since dead) dog approached an adder that was sunning itself on our garden path. When I lived in Germany, my best friends had several large constrictors that fascinated me. However, I prefer cats as pets!
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I certainly wouldn’t want one as a pet, but if they leave me in peace … I’ll leave them in peace.
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I am scared of them too and would probably scream and faint. And the title just fits, smiles.
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I see a couple of allusions in this stunning poem; Harry Potter and the Biblical Fall. I admit, I’m a sucker for allusion! The dream sequence in the opening is filled with surrealism that caught me immediately with the experience of the fear. Well done! The connection between the dream and the reality of the story that follows flows in such a way that your reader is not certain where to draw the line. Oh, and I love the rhyme scheme 🙂
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Thank you, Jilly! Sometimes I think you see more in my poetry than I do. But I’ll just say, “Yes, I’m glad you noticed that,” and pretend intelligence. Glad you enjoyed my snaky poem!
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I’m personally afraid of any snake. This poem however, really gripped me with fear of the thought of snakes. And your poem is brilliantly well written my friend. 🙂
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Thank you, Charlie! High praise indeed.
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You welcome my friend.
I got another new poem up. Check it. 🙂
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Will do! Care to check my flash fiction? Just for grins.
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Send me the link. 🙂
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https://lifeinportofino.wordpress.com/category/fiction/
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I really like this.
This is my favorite part:
“A black serpent here
upright voiceless scream”
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That used to be my least favorite part, when it was really happening. Glad you liked my work!
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I love the voice! Beautifully written. ❤
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My turn to say thank you!
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You’re welcome! ❤
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Yeah.. it’s hard for me
to kill too.. sure..
even a snake..
or a roach
or even
a flea..
i just
let ’em
bee.. even
a wasp who
wants to sting..
hmm.. never had
a cotton mouth come
to bed.. i suppose there
IS A first for everything..
my friEnd..
iN
KiLLinG
SpRinG..;)
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The snake in the bed was a boyhood nightmare. The Cottonmouth was last summer’s real nightmare! Trust me: when you’re holding a shovel and giving the snake ample opportunity to skedaddle, and it comes after you… Snake 0, Charley 1. I love animals. I love living. Easy choice.
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Haha.. True
My FriEnd
With
SMiLes..:)
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;;;shiver:::…snakes….give me the willies too
Seriously enjoyed the style and structure of this poem…creates a interesting tempo.
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Thank you! I appreciate the response to the craft.
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I understand fear of snakes. that’s why I kill them all, (except grass snakes). you just can’t tell the good from the bad. Your dreamscape weaves around fantasy and reality, kind of snakey like, very good
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Actually, you can tell them apart. You have to study snakes to know them. Cottonmouths have an angry brow and come right for you. ’nuff said! Glad you enjoyed it!
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Thanks Charley.
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Snakes are quite creepy. I also find them quite mysterious but not enough to put myself in harm’s way haha.
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I don’t intentionally do so. Glad you enjoyed my poem.
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love the title and i snakes is not my friend, too! 😀
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Thank you!
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most welcome, Charley!
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Yes off with their heads. I am not a snake lover either. Though I know some are quite necessary…bkm
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Glad you enjoyed… the carnage. 🙂
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Wasn’t it Indiana Jones who said “Snakes, Why’d it have to be snakes?” That seemed the one thing that creeped him out! I don’t mind snakes. I mostly see black racers in our yard…harmless, beneficial for the ecology. I’ve never come upon a venomous snake in all my years of living (and walking in the woods) in Florida but my grandfather found and killed rattlesnakes on his property here several times.
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I guess it’s just my luck to have one come to me! Glad you enjoyed the poem!
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This is absolutely brilliant writing and I love the title 😀
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Thank you!
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This is absolutely brilliant writing 😀 especially love that title
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Thank you!
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Loved the visceral fear that you brought out in your poem. ..and then got a nice chuckle from your warning at the end 🙂
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Thank you, Bryan!
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If you like edge-of-your-seat reading… I have a flash fiction piece called “Smooth as Silk.” It’s on my blog under the fiction category.
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